Norma Chu (L) is escorted during the ceremony at the National Capitol Building in Washington on May 19, 2005 (Getty Images)

At times, the family’s lives have taken a dramatic turn. This family of three arrived in the United States in the 1990s while living in Romania because of the civil war, when they came to the United States together — as Romanian émigrés were fleeing violence for the United States’ better safety. “One night he came to my house,” says Vito, referring to one of the many nights when the two families came together inside a makeshift home. They began to eat and watch television, and when they did, “we started arguing,” says Vito. “He accused me of having affairs with foreigners, of not leaving the house regularly.” “I always say you need a big heart,” she continues, her eyes shining with joy and pride. “But that can be difficult. Vito and me were different.” Vito had always wanted to marry a married man; her family was in Romania at the time, and she wanted to help her father. “After five years, we began to work at the same job,” she says. “We felt we were a good fit. Then it fell apart.” As the relationship became more serious and serious, she says, her father started to use her father’s car and cash from their monthly rental payments. When she learned his parents had divorced when she was just seven, she asked her mother for custody, and was told they would get back together at some point. “In my mind, I knew this would be it.” She was about 12, and all the while, she began to resent her father. She says it took two attempts — one, on her father’s own accord, and one, a year into the relationship — before they managed to get out. “I knew she hated him,” says Vito. “It was almost impossible, because of the way they lived in America. I always blamed him for ruining my family.” In the spring of 2004 she and her mother, Marina, arrived in San Diego, hoping to find a home, but she found a new family there. Their children, now in their late teens, were already “well adjusted” and loved going to school, the daughter says. To help get them on the right track, they enrolled them in a Latino-English immersion program. By the end of the program, both children spoke English flu